100 kisses

this message is suitable for men out there. lol

A lawyer working abroad wrote to his wife....


DEAR Darling,

I can't send you my salary this month because the global market crisis has
affected my Company's performance, so I am sending 100 kisses. You are my
sweetheart, please adjust.

Your loving husband,

J SINGH



His wife replied...

Dear Hubby ,

Thanks for the 100 kisses,
Below is the list of expenses I paid with the Kisses...:

1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month's milk.
2. The electricity man agreed not to disconnect only after 7 kisses.
3. Your landlord Balkar Singh comes every day to take 2 or 3 kisses instead of the monthly rent.
4. Supermarket owner Jaswant Singh did not accept kisses only, so I gave
him other items, I hope you understand..
5. Miscellaneous expenses 40 kisses.

Please don't worry about me, I still have a balance of 35 kisses and I hope
I can survive the month using this balance....

Shall I plan the same for the next month?

Your Sweet Heart,

Kichi

.

words more than action.

tears.

tears of woman

"Mom, why are you crying?" he asked his mom.

"Because I'm a woman" she told him.

"I don't understand," he said.

His mom just hugged him and said, "and you never will." Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"

"All women cry for no reason" was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to GOD. When GOD got on the phone the man said, "GOD, why do women cry so easily?"

GOD said:

"When I made women she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world; yet, gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly. This same sensitivity helps her to make a child's boo-boo feel better and shares in her teenagers anxieties and fears.

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

I gave her a tear to shed, it's hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed. It's her only weakness; it's a tear for mankind."

THE ROSE WITHIN!

A certain man planted a rose and watered it faithfully and before it blossomed, he examined it.

He saw the bud that would soon blossom, but noticed thorns upon the stem and he thought, "How can any beautiful flower come from a plant burdened with so many sharp thorns? Saddened by this thought, he neglected to water the rose, and just before it was ready to bloom... it died.

So it is with many people. Within every soul there is a rose. The God-like qualities planted in us at birth, grow amid the thorns of our faults. Many of us look at ourselves and see only the thorns, the defects.

We despair, thinking that nothing good can possibly come from us. We neglect to water the good within us, and eventually it dies. We never realize our potential.

Some people do not see the rose within themselves; someone else must show it to them. One of the greatest gifts a person can possess is to be able to reach past the thorns of another, and find the rose within them.

U SEE!! THIS IS HOW PPLS SIMPLY LOOK AT YOU.

This is one of the characteristic of love... to look at a person, know their true faults and accepting that person into your life... all the while recognizing the nobility in their soul. Help others to realize they can overcome their faults. If we show them the "rose" within themselves, they will conquer their thorns. Only then will they blossom many times over.

funny :D

Situasi : Anda ditahan oleh pihak polis kerana kenderaan anda bergerak melebihi had kelajuan yang ditetapkan



Polis: Cik! Kenapa pandu laju sangat nie? tak sabar nak jumpe malaikat ke?



Hanafi: err.. tuan.. nak buat macam mane. dah motor saya ni laju.. kalo tanak bagi saya bawak laju, kenapa tetapkan meter ni sampai 160km/j?.. skali sy pulas minyak.. meter naik… asal sy pulas je… meter naik… saya takot rosak meter saya kejap naik, kejap turun.. kejap naik tuan.. kang jahanam meter sy tak pasal kne ganti baru.. tuan nak ganti ke? lagipon minyak motor saya ni penuh..



Polis: @#$@#^#%^



Situasi: Anda telah melanggar lampu isyarat



Polis: Aduhaiii.. cik… kenape la pegi redah je… kenapa taknak berhenti??



Badri: lo? asal kene berhenti plak??



Polis: Kan masa cik redah tadi lampu merah??



Badri: Apa kaitan dengan berhenti??



Polis: Merah kan tanda berhenti!!



Badri: Lo??.. kenapa tak tulis berhenti kat lampu merah tu? aku ingatkan rosak lampu tu.. kejap merah, kejap kuning, kejap hijau… selagi tak nmpak tanda berhenti… aku redah je la..



Polis: wargh!!!!!!



Situasi: Anda ditahan kerana tidak mempunyai lesen, tapi memandu di jalan raya..



Alasan 1:

Polis: dik.. mintak lesen…

Hanafi: erk!!.. pehal plak mintak lesen orang nip?

Polis: saya nak tengok lesen adik… tah ada tah tidak..

Hanafi: ehh… sorry sket ye?.. pehal nak tengop lesen owng nip.. saya bayar RM490 taw untuk sebijik lesen ni!! senang-senang je mintak org punye.. nak lesen pergi amek sendiri la!! bayar sendiri la!! ingat boleh dapat free ke? berak pon kene bayar!! (lagi best korang terus tinggalkan polis tu)



Polis: jengkreng kongkeng perem peng heng punye bdak..



Alasan 2:

Polis: Dik mintak lesen!!

Hanafi: hoih!!! pehal ni.. gila ke! tadi saya nak bagi lesen saya kat polis yang duk belakang sana tu… ingat saya ada berapa banyak lesen ha?? kalo nak jgak pegi mintak la kat polis belakang sana nun.. dlm 5 kilo meter dari sini.. lebih senang tuan buat la lesen sendiri!! ape ni… hoihh!!!!



Polis: Sewel pny budak…



Situasi: Anda di tahan kerana membuat aksi merbahaya di jalanraya



Polis: ni sorg agi.. motor tayar 2 bagi kasik 1.. pehal korang angkat tayar depan haa?



Hanafi: erk… begini tuan.. kitorg bukan merempit.. tadi saya dan geng-geng saya nampak lipas lalu depan motor kitorg.. kalo kitorg langgar, zalim namanya.. semut pun Nabi elak.. ni kan pulak lipas.. apa salahnya kalo kita ikut Nabi.. jadi kitorg angkat la tayar motor kitorg nak bagi penghormatan pada lipas ni.. kasik diorg chan nak idop.. kalo dia mati.. sape nak tanggung keluarga dia ni..



Polis: aduh!!! kene lagi!!



Situasi: Anda ditahan kerana anda membonceng, sedangkan anda baru lesen L



Polis: Dik.. tau tak adik da buat salah ni.. adik baru pegang lesen L.. mane boleh membonceng..



Badri: Lesen L untuk sorang je kan?



Polis: A’ah.. tau pun,… abes kenapa membonceng??



Hanafi: dah sekarang saya pegang L, kawan saya badri pon pegang lesen L.. kitorg ada 2 L jadi kitorg boleh naik 2 orang la satu motor.. lagi pon depan dan belakang sticker L ada.. 2 Sticker L, dan 2 Pegang lesen L…. Sorry ye tuan…



Polis: warghh!! kenapa dunia ini begitu kejam!!!

:D

Physics for Scientists And Engineers 6th Ed. by Serway And Jewett

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